How to Teach a Child to Read Who Doesn't Want To—7 Tips

by Mary Follin

​Are you a parent looking for ideas on how to teach a child to read who DOESN'T want to learn? Let’s face it, sometimes teaching a child to read who doesn't want to feels like work. In the early lessons, there are some basics that need to be covered before the real fun begins. Learning all the sounds of the alphabet can be a tedious process, but until your child knows those, he or she won’t get to enjoy sounding out words and, well, reading.

When you're working with your child (on anything, for that matter), does she wiggle a lot? Does he want to talk about what he's got on the bottom of his shoe? Does she look at everything but what you're trying to show her?
If so, your child is perfectly normal. And fortunately, teaching reading with phonics is simple, straight-forward, and works like building blocks. Over time, even the most distracted pupil can learn how to read.

7 Tips: How to Teach a Child to Read Who Doesn't Want to

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  1. Keep it short. Three to five minutes a day, three to five days a week is plenty of time to spend on lessons. Short sessions help keep your child engaged, and as an added bonus, you will always leave your young pupil wanting more!
  2. Praise your child. Reward her with hugs and applause, even when things seem to be moving slowly. There are certain personality-types that will do anything for praise. If your child is one of those, hang a chart on the wall and put a gold star on it each time you finish a lesson. Take her to tea when she earns a week’s worth of stars.
  3. Be creative. Draw a picture of a word after she reads it. Or balloons when she gets her sounds right.
  4. Get moving. To keep your child physically engaged, let him blow bubbles or throw a ball each time he gets a word right. 
  5. Make it cozy. Ideally, lesson time is on-your-lap time. If your child doesn’t get enough of this on most days, spending time on your lap will help keep him still. (Not too much time, though. You’ve got a short window before your child will want to get down. See #1!)
  6. Check your child’s vitals. Make sure your child is comfortable, well-fed, and rested before you begin each lesson.
  7. Give it up. If it becomes too much of a struggle, stop and pick up where you left off next time. Sometimes, it’s a good idea to set the materials aside for a few weeks—or months. Take your cue from your child. She might be letting you know that she’s not ready yet.
In any reading program for children under the age of 5, the lessons really must stick to a 5 minute limit to accommodate the short attention span of a small child (or a busy parent). You must also be willing to put the lessons aside if your child displays signs that he or she isn't ready. One of the biggest downfalls is the overzealousness of the parent; it’s tempting to keep pushing everything along so that you can start seeing results.

If this is how you feel, please don’t rush your child. There are no deadlines. Try to remember that each lesson is a time of enrichment, not measured success. Showing off your child's reading skills to friends and family may put undue pressure on her. Believe me, as your child's confidence grows, she will proudly display on her own what she has learned!

​If you've been wondering how to teach a child to read who doesn't want to learn, don't worry. All it takes is time, patience, and a willingness to set a pace that works for your child.

​You'll get there!
Check out 'ASK MOM' in Fredericksburg Parent & Family magazine for advice on issues you may be experiencing as a parent! 
Follow @advice_mom on Instagram for parenting videos, stories, and humor!
Winner of the Gertrude Warner Book Award and the Moonbeam Children's Book Award, an adventure for kids ages 8-12 who love video games. Available on Audible, Kindle & paperback.
Founder and creator Mary Follin started her career as a systems engineer with IBM. She's worked in product development, market research, and more recently provides marketing consulting to professional services firms. Beyond creating Teach Your Child to Read™, she is also the author of Ethyr, winner of the the Moonbeam Children's Book Award and the Gertrude Warner Book Award.
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Mary is also author, with Kristi Crosson, of the advice column ASK MOM in Fredericksburg Parent & Family magazine.
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